Philippines Books

Archive for May 5th, 2008

Taking A Look At The Cost Of A Funeral.

Unfortunately Philippines law prevents foreigners from operating funeral parlors and that is a shame as they are a very lucrative business, indeed. I know of one Chinoy (Chinese-Filipino) who owns three funeral homes in Cebu and he makes around P3million a month. Even allowing for overheads and expenses, wages and taxes, he still does extremely well by Filipino standards and not too badly by anybody else’s.

As Benjamin Franklin noted, the only two things in life that are certain and unavoidable are death and taxes. In the Philippines you can actually avoid one, but not the other. The whole business of dying makes money for several people. Of course the hospital has usually pumped thousands out of the relatives in a vain last ditch attempt to sustain life. Some canny relatives though, sensing the inevitable, will hold back that last transfusion, knowing the blood will only leak out onto the bed with the rest of the donations (at P1500 a pop!) so why not keep the money and put it toward the funeral? When you live in such close proximity to the poverty line, you learn to be a little more pragmatic than those better off might have to.

Once the patient becomes the deceased, the funeral home is called and a van sent around to pick up the body. The relatives may accompany the body back to the funeral home in the hearse or mortuary van, if only to save on taxi fares and also to ensure the body doesn’t disappear en route. It happens from time to time, especially around the time medical students are in need of body parts for their studies. You think I’m joking, don’t you?

At the funeral home the bereaved will be asked if the deceased had SSS, social security insurance. If they were employed and lucky enough to have paid in SSS contributions, they will have nearly all of their funeral expenses paid for them. Funeral homes like SSS contributors as clients. They know they will get most of their money, guaranteed. SSS pays the firt P20,000 or so of the bill, which guarantees you aren’t getting out of there for less than about P30,000. Fortunately you can pay the balance three days before the interment of the body.

Depending on what standard of service the relatives have asked and paid for, the funeral parlor will begin to prepare the body.. They clean the body and then make an incision and pump it full of preservative. If you have paid for the good stuff then it behooves you to hang around and make sure you aren’t short changed. Some parlors are notorious for slipping in the cheap stuff. If the body is to lie in state for the full ten days or so, then the cheap stuff will have it turning nasty colors before the coffin lid is closed and the body buried. Not nice.

P35,000 buys a nice casket and all the trimmings, such as the stand, the candle sticks and flower baskets, a lectern for the prayer readers to use and so on. You also get the hearse to deliver the body to the house where it will lie in state for up to ten days, and then take it to the church and graveyard.

You can get cheaper caskets but sometimes they have a tendency to soak up the fluids from the body and quickly rot and fall apart in the tropical heat. I have seen one collapse as the body was carried from the house to the hearse, not very dignified.

The ten days lying in state might get expensive also. You may need to hire a marquee to cover the mourners who will be keeping vigil day and night (just in case the deceased changes their mind). Mahjong will be played, refreshments served numerous times a day and a service will be held every night. Same service. Every night. You will pay for the lay preachers to hold the service and of course the musicians, blind ones are preferred.

The priest will show up on the last day and hold a Mass, and expect to be paid of course. The usual minimum is P1000, but wealthier mourners are expected to pay more. On the way to the cemetary you may recoup some of your expenses as passing motorists will throw three coins in front of you to ward off the evil spirits that may be hanging around the procession. When you get to the cemetery you will have had to buy the plot, usually from the Barangay Captain. You need a cement sarcophagus made and once the coffin is entombed, the local mason will come and seal it up for you.

Then, each year when you visit on All Souls Day (1 November) you can plan that roof to shade everyone from the sun, maybe some seating built in and so on. Before that happens you will have been to the Lapidera and ordered the headstone, maybe another P5000 or more, depending on how fancy you order it to be. Watch for spelling and grammar, I have seen references to “Her Wife” and “His Husband” lying there in eternal rest.

All up even a modest funeral can set you back P50,000, say just under US$1000. Halve that if the deceased had SSS insurance, but still quite a burden for the average Filipino family to shoulder. Yes, if it was legal for me to open one, I’d be into the funeral business like a scalded cat.