Philippines Books

Posts Tagged ‘quack doctor’

There are many infections one can catch when living or visiting the Philippines. I remember leaving after one trip of just a week in Manila when as the plane reached altitude and pressurised, virtually everybody in the cabin started to cough! Perhaps it was the cleaner air being filtered and pumped through that kicked us all off but I recall very distinctly quite a few minutes of coughing and nose blowing. I was cleaning dark matter from my nostrils for days and had an annoying nose twitch for a week or two until I made conscious effort to get it under control.

Working in Cebu in an office tower we had foreigners coming and going all the time on various three and six month projects. The first week would have them coughing and suffering from a chest infection that I believe was caused by the air-conditioning system. A good dose of anti-biotics bought over the counter from the nearest Mercury Drugstore and they were quickly back in action but just about every new expat employee copped this. If you spend time going into and out of air-conditioned buildings and cabs you are very susceptible to such illnesses. When we lived in Bogo in a fan only house and rarely enjoyed the cool of an air-conditioned environment I rarely had any problems. As soon as we were able to afford air-conditioning and we enjoyed it, this changed and colds and chest infections became more commonplace.

Another minor affliction that causes major distress is ‘pink eye’, ’sore eye’ or conjunctivitis. It passes quickly from person to person via touching what they have touched and then touching your face. I stayed at a resort on Malapascua where first one of the staff had the tissue to the eye, then the owner, then half the guests! You can get drops for this from the drugstore but it is very annoying and can last several days.

I was also able to experience the skin rash so many of us get when we first start to live in the Philippines for longer than a month or two. It is a collection of red spots on the chest and groin that look like freckles or measles. I have no idea what it was but the Quack Doctor healed it by spitting something on the affected area and the next day I was fine! Don’t write off the local Hilot or Quack Doctor. They have been providing health care for the Filipino for centuries and have it pretty well wrapped up as far as local ailments go. They are terrific for muscular and bone setting situations but if you have something that requires micro-surgery or similar, see a western physician.

You might get an ear infection from the pools or sea. If so, get a local to boil some Hilpas weed and then stick it in your ear as hot as you can handle it. It might seem funny to have green goop sticking out of your ear but it works. As soon as it went in I felt it send finger of healing down the tubes and sinuses from ear to nose and mouth. It was amazing as I could feel it clearing out the passages and easing the pain I had felt in the side of my face. My mother-in-law administered it and said she used to give it to her brothers and father when they copped ear aches from cyanide fishing.

As for other forms of infection such as STDs, these are usually treated with a one shot oral prophylactic nowadays and are available without prescription if you know what you want. I do not advise self prescription as I have done it before for myself and it is a bit of a gamble. It costs about ten bucks to see a well qualified (probably US trained) doctor and get the right treatment first time.

The Philippines are a tropical locale. This means there is the risk of catching things that do not exist back home. You might also forego adequate rest and hydration for party time and lots of alcohol. Take care of yourself and the best cure is prevention, as always.

Taking A Look At The Cost Of A Pregnancy

Last month we took a peek at how much it costs to leave this mortal coil. This month we’ll start at the beginning and discuss bringing a new Filipino into the world. I have only been responsible for one new mouth to feed in this burgeoning land, but I have done my research and it is interesting how the costs and what you get for your peso varies from place to place. I can’t comment on Manila, although I have been led to believe the situation is pretty similar and prices fairly consistent.

So, you and the Asawa are about to enjoy the blessed event, you’re in the family way, she has a bun in the oven or, as they say in Visayan, she is Buntis! Well done but now you have to suffer the mood swings of the first trimester, the incredible urges of the second trimester and the dragged out interminable length of the third trimester! Personally I wouldn’t want to suffer through that again and I remind the Asawa of this whenever the subject arises. Since she is a Filipina and we only have two kids (I inherited a lovely daughter) this subject does arise often. She also thinks I would have an illegitimate child with another woman providing it is son! As far fetched as that sounds to us foreigners, it is perfectly reasonable to a Filipina.

If you think you are too old to become a Daddy (again perhaps), then stay away from the Philippines. I know men who have fathered at the age of 73 and men hitting retirement age at 65 and being a new parent at the same time is not at all a rare occurrence here. Some might argue how fair that is for the child, will they ever really know their father? Who knows? People are living longer these days and if having a child with a woman 30 or 40 years your junior keeps you feeling young, who is to say what is and isn’t right? 

What is important is that if you have the child, make sure you look after the poor little tyke! That care starts as soon as you know the Asawa is pregnant. Women are funny creatures and I haven’t all the answers but I have learnt that what might seem trivial to us mere males is of vital significance to a pregnant Filipina. Keep in mind they may be sensitive and insecure to begin with and all of a sudden they are burdened with bringing a new life into the world. She wouldn’t be the first woman to wonder if you are going to stick around until and then after the big day! Some reassurance, no matter how trite and banal it might sound to your male ears, just might make all the difference.

Remember women go through some major hormonal swings when pregnant, it is a big deal after all. You really have to give them a lot of leeway and put up with a great deal of BS, for want of a more apt term! Not just the regular female pregnant BS, but the stuff that has her wearing black bra and panties to keep the Onggu’s away, or stuffing leaves in the window sills and pinning black patches onto her clothing. I must admit the Juju works as we didn’t get one Onggu coming around wanting to rip into the foetus! Some of these Onggu’s actually cut themselves in half and fly away into the night, then crash through the roof and drop onto the sleeping mum to be and devour the baby! Not worth the risk! Get the black knickers and keep them handy!

You also need to keep away from old women down the market. Many of these crones are actually Onggu’s themselves and love to disrupt the pregnancy by touching the swelling belly. They cluck and make cooing noises but in reality they are sucking the vitality out of the unborn! Don’t let it happen and make sure she has her Anting Anting pinned to her black bra!

Now, should you make it to the big day, you will have had to attend a pre-natal every month. Or maybe not! Some women can’t afford it or don’t want the expense, others will rely on the Barangay Quack Doctor or local midwife. Personally I have a lot of faith in these midwives. They have seen just about everything there is to see when it comes to Ob-Gyn work! Forget Stanford Medical School or wherever, these old hags have been in the front line for generations.

Our local Quack successfully turned our baby when it was threatening a breech presentation and the rather expensive, US trained Ob-Gyn specialist in Cebu was too scared to risk trying this. Of course I was left in ignorant bliss about what was happening to my child or maybe I would have stuck my fat foreigner face in where it turned out not to be needed.

Now at first we wanted the local doctor in the province to handle the pre-natal and delivery but she refused. It seems us foreigners have a reputation of complaining about everything and not finding local standards up to snuff. Actually, for a rural practise I have always felt Dr Dublin runs a pretty tight ship up there in Daanbantayan. Anyway, we had already cancelled our Cebu Doctors’ Hospital Specialist after the breech presentation fiasco and we didn’t think we’d make it down to Cebu in time anyway. Or else we would have to hang around in a hotel there for a week racking up the bills. Plus when I told the Asawa she could spend whatever she saved on some nice jewellery she was quite happy to look for something cheaper than the P25,000 (starting price and providing here were no complications) Cebu Doctor’s were charging. If she needs a caesarean and quite often the wives of foreigners do, that will set you back at least P50,000 or so at Chung Hua or Cebu Doctors’.

There are packages in Cebu at the Cebu Maternity Hospital from about P10,000 and this includes all the pre-natal check ups, ultra sounds and so on. A friend of ours insisted his wife have their child there as it was a maternity hospital and not a hospital full of sick people. If you have seen your average Filipino hospital you would understand his point. Basic hygiene is ignored as money for cleaners and maintenance is pocketed by the administrators and nursing staff are too proud of their professional status to clean walls and windows. Or do much else other than stand around and chat!

My sister in law had a P10,000 package deal at the Vellez Hospital but when she had complications and later, tragically died, the limitations of the “package” became evident. We could not move her to a private, aircon room because then we would have to pay for the doctor’s visits. Even though the room was right next to the public one she had been in for days! The rigid adherence to ridiculous “hospital policy” amidst emergency situations and surrounded by a total lack of professionalism really does make us foreigners wild. Perhaps Dr Dublin knew a thing or two I didn’t?

In the end we spent around P12,000 and had the baby delivered at Medellin Base Hospital. We had to buy our own delivery kit for the doctor and her team to use in the delivery room! This cost a few thousand but the local drug stores know what’s on the list and stock everything. Make sure you insist on pain killers for the wife for before and after delivery, the word epidural was unknown to the midwife! The doctor had heard of the term but since few of her patients could afford such luxury, she never wrote a script for it!

Be there and make sure you know what is supposed to happen because not all of the staff may know much about nursing, first aid, basic health and hygiene etc. Just because they graduated nursing school doesn’t mean much in my experience. I studied my US Army Special Forces Medical Handbook, an absolute must for any Expat! When the nurse brought my newborn daughter to me, I knew enough to know she had fluid on the lung and needed to be drained and ventilated. I turned her over and fluid poured out of her! Frightening.

My oldest daughter was born at home with just my father in law assisting. It thankfully went without a hitch as the midwife was delayed and of course, it was virtually free. However, although babies have been born since Adam was a lad, maybe I’m too much of a modern day wimp. Pay the money and get the best medical care for your wife and new born that you can afford. And be thankful you can afford it.

Visiting The Quack Doctor.

If you are living on a Filipino budget, i.e.; a frayed shoestring, then getting sick is one of the ever present fears that can spell out and out financial ruin.  A visit to a private hospital might set you back
several thousand pesos for just a few days stay, and that is providing the hospital admits you at the same level of treatment and accommodation as they would a Filipino.  Foreigners are well known to
complain about the primitive conditions and lack of adequate medical facilities and no self respecting hospital administrator would want to open that packet of buwad voluntarily.

Even if you are not turned away from the local government hospital, the conditions and treatment available may very well be hardly worth the few pesos it will cost you.  If you don’t have medical insurance (covered in a future issue) then you may have to look at less costly, but also less conventional alternatives.

The Quack Doctors, as they are legitimately called, are practitioners of the native healing art of Hilot.  When I trained in the Filipino martial art of Arnis, I was also taught some Hilot techniques.  Mostly
bone setting and muscular ailment treatments using herbs and liniments as these were the main injuries caused by training.

The Hilot I was taught was all very valid and extremely effective naturopathic style medicine.  What is offered as Hilot from the local Quack doctor is not all so legitimate in my opinion.  From the half a
dozen Quack Doctors I have seen I would say that 70% of what they do is very good and effective medicine.  The other 30% is pure mumbo jumbo! Lots of spiritual healing and waving of charms, mumbling and palming goats entrails and chicken blood to make it appear as if they operate without anaesthetic. 

Having said all of that, I have personally observed an operation where I swear I saw the doctors’ hand go into the patients’ abdomen.  I can’t explain it but if it was a trick then it was a very clever one.  I also know of several rip off artists practising around Cebu, but they  won’t see a foreigner as a patient.

Your genuine barangay quack doctor will see foreigners and they will treat you just as they would a local and most expect the same fee, “up to you!”.  I usually leave P40 or P50, but my wife will leave P20.

I have been treated for skin rashes, ear aches, tooth aches, pulled muscles and G.I. tract problems, all very successfully.  My wife has been misdiagnosed by one so called famous quack operating in Cebu down near Colon, but thankfully no harm was done.  When she was pregnant it was the quack doctor who was successful in turning the baby so she was no longer a breach.  Our western trained obstetrician was too worried to risk it!  Of course the wizened old hag we went to has been bringing
Filipino’s into this world since WW2!

I think there has to be a lot of value in local healers.  These people have been practising their medicine for generations, centuries in fact and long before the arrival of the Spaniards.  They must have a better than 50% success rate or else by now the people would be wise to them and few would attend their “practise” for treatment.

If it is something serious that requires micro surgery, or a major illness or disease then I would still seek western medical help. For many everyday ailments however, I truly believe the local Hilot practitioner, the Quack Doctor can offer very affordable relief and treatment.  Over the many years the same ailments and maladies would have presented themselves time and time again.  These quacks were for many years the only form of medicine available, they can’t all be charlatans and not all of their treatment mere trickery.  Logic would dictate sufficient veracity in their methods to have kept them in business down through the ages, especially in a society where not so long ago you would not be just tarred and feathered for being a snake oil salesman, you would be executed.

Many Quacks are also the village witch doctor, so you can see them if the Onggu’s are giving your pigs a hard time.  We lost eight in a row (along with most of the piggeries in the area) and it was only after the quack did his thing that we were Onggu free and since then, no more losses.   Of course this was about the same time we put up flyscreens around the styes to keep the birds out.  The birds spread disease from one farm to another, but we know it was really the Onggu’s!

If you have a problem you think the Quack might fix, then have your Asawa take you to them.  She will know where to find one and what’s even better, they will charge so little you will feel guilty feeling the relief from their treatment!  Some of their treatment may seem a little bizarre, but it usually works very quickly.  I have had a long standing heat rash cleared up after just one spitting!  The quack
chewed on some herb, then spat on my rash and it was clear within 24 hours!  Another time I spent an hour with a bit of grass sticking out of my ear to cure chronic ear ache brought on by too much scuba diving. I looked a little strange with a green weed in one ear but the pain relief was almost instantaneous.  Keep an open mind and give them a go, if pain persists, see a doctor etc!