Philippines Books

Archive for the ‘Safety’ Category

I don’t know why, but many men think marrying a Filipina means they don’t have to work at the marriage like they would if they married a woman from their own country.  Filipina’s are women, just the same as American females or English females. Women. A strange breed to us men and full of surprises.

We choose Filipina’s in the most part because they accept us as we are, more so than the women back home.  Modern American women, for instance, seem hellbent on proving that they are not just our equals, but superior to us mere males.  OK, maybe they are, but the Filipina is more inclined to let us
believe we are in charge!  They are more old fashioned, the kind of woman Dad married and all of that, but they are women all the same. So, after the killer divorce and the cleaning out of your bank account
you turn your attention eastwards and look for solace in the loving arms of a woman maybe 20 years your junior (on average), maybe more.  What have you two got in common?  Why is she willing to accept you, a fat, forty plus foreigner, maybe fifty or sixty plus? She is this exotic, 20 something beauty, why you?

There are as many reasons as there are Filipina’s, but two or three seem pretty constant and recurring.  Firstly, you are the exotic one.  She will want children and the Filipino obsession with fair skin and western features means the offspring will be guaranteed to be beautiful!

Secondly, most Filipina’s either have difficulty judging our age ( a common thing with many Asian women) or prefer a more mature man.  A man less likely to stray and more likely to stay.  And usually more financially secure. Which brings us to reason number three. The majority of western men who marry a Filipina do not marry into money. They do not court and wed a young lady, half their age, from the monied classes.  They marry women from the lower socio-ecoomic strata. That’s pretty much a fact.  What else is a fact is that the rich Filipino’s daughter has everything she needs, money, education, travel potential and thus doesn’t need an average Joe from Hangnail, Iowa to sweep her off her feet and to a life of luxury in the land of plenty.

The girl you are most likely to meet will be lucky if she ever went to college. If she did, I doubt it was the Filipino Ivy League variant.  Her family will be large, extended and some may be looking forward to your largesse, even if the immediate family are not.  Her English may not be as fluent as first thought, there will be numerous opportunities to practise your communication skills in the years to come as she takes your words and interprets them completely about face to how they were intended.

However, despite her humble origins, she will be loving, loyal and dedicated to your well being. Most of them will be, anyway.  There are bad apples in the Filipina barrel the same as there are men you would be ashamed to inflict upon your ex-wife! To her, even a regular working stiff has a life of plenty she has only dreamed  of. If you take her back to the States, she will have a major period of adjustment to get through, and so will you.  Don’t expect her to know the “simplest” things we take for granted, like what goes in the refrigerator and what doesn’t.  Everything will go in there and on a plate covered by another plate, even if you have a saran wrap factory dumping free samples in your
backyard.

It won’t be long before you are faced with the eternal question: how much do you give to the family back in “da province”, if anything? How do you say enough is enough?  At some stage there will be an emergency and you will want to help.  At other times you may feel like a walking ATM machine with a
neon sign on your head reading “patsy”.  Your mileage will vary as eac marriage is different, but here are a few tips I have gathered from friends and my own experience.

Set a limit to how much she is allowed to remit to her family each month.  A  hundred bucks goes a long way over here and shouldn’t break anyone’s bank, especially if both of you are working.  It helps the family out while not giving anyone an excuse to give up their job and hang around the Western Union office every second day.  (Western Union, by the way, is an expensive but fast and reliable way to send money. I’d advise you find another way as the fees get pretty high.)  Sending too much means family members just might not have any reason to work and support themselves.  Sending too little is stingy and insulting, better to send nothing.  Some couples never send any money on a regular basis
simply to avoid having relatives depend on them for their livelihood. Some people I know only send money when a specific request is made, such as for a funeral, birth, hospital emergency etc. In some families, they lead lives far more exciting than the average soap opera cast and seem to be forever in
dire peril.

Everyone needs to set their own limits, and make sure you do make at least a mental decision to give X and no more.  If your wife works then it is fair enough to let her decide how much of her salary she will send to her family. Some may send all because they are so warm and generous by nature. Others may do the same but only to show off to the family back home. Family ties are strong and not always clear cut, so don’t be in a hurry to apply your homespun American values on your new Filipina bride. Take the time to really learn why she does as she does.

Then there will be the time when you simply can’t afford to send what is asked, or you don’t want to.  Everyone has a limit.  The best way to deal with a request for money is to tell whoever is asking that you will think about it. It’s a lot of money and you need time to assess the request.  Then you do nothing.  If they ask again, you can tell them you are still thinking. By now they should have taken your polite hint that the answer is no.  If they ask a third time, either the situation is desperate, or the borrower is. That’s up to you to decide.

Never loan money to relatives, always consider it a gift, even if the arrangement is, on the surface, a loan.  That way if you never see the money again, for whatever reason, you aren’t disappointed.  Another way to handle the request is to tell them that you can’t afford it this month, but you will see if you have enough next month.  If they ask again next month, then repeat the excuse.

The whole secret is to never say “NO” directly.  There is no reason to say the “N” word, Filipino’s don’t.  That is why they will take your order for a drink, knowing full well they are out of stock of whatever it was you ordered. It is more important that they don’t offend you than actually serve you  what you ordered. Get it?  So do the same and nobody will be upset. Simple. More or  less! 

GETTING YOUR DRIVER’S LICENSE
TRANSFERRED

If you visit the Philippines for less than ninety days you are entitled to drive a vehicle, similar to what your home license allows, without the need for an International License or to obtain a Philippine Driver’s License.  If you plan to stay, and drive, longer than three months, then I would advise you to
obtain the local document.

Many might wonder why on earth you would want to drive here anyway, given the seeming chaos on the roads and the cheap and available alternatives. Quite frankly, I have only ridden with one or two Filipino driver’s who I would say come close to my skill and experience with a motor vehicle.  Most
drivers here are self taught and haven’t a clue about road safety.  Neither have the pedestrians, dogs, chickens, carabaos, goats etc.

The policing of the road rules is arbitrary at best and everyone does pretty
much what they like, with scant regard for the consequences.  When God is protecting them, they have little need for decent brakes, seat belts or common sense.  The amazing thing is that there are not more accidents than occur.  Don’t believe those who tell you the accident rate here is low. It isn’t! If you drive often enough and in the major cities, you will see plenty of prangs!  Official figures are misleading because few accidents are reported. What keeps the death toll down is that many of the accidents are low speed “fender benders” in heavy traffic.  However, I have seen more than  my share
of higher speed fatal accidents on the major carriageways and country roads, usually involving trucks, buses, jeepneys and other large vehicles carrying multiple passengers.  Another factor is the Filipino attitude is generally much less insistent on “right of way” than it is in the west.  I have often said if you could blend the discipline of the western driver with the attitude of the Filipino, you would have the safest roads in the world.  The best advice is to never be in a hurry and always expect the dumbest, most dangerous option to be the one chosen by Dong in his jeepney.

I once offered the theory of the “Rule of Threes” as to who give way to whom.  If you have three times as many passengers, three axles or more or three times the gross tonnage, you have right of way.  Three times the speed of the rest of the traffic, three quarters of your vehicle or more over the center
line or three times the decibel level from your horn and you are sweet! Number of wheels helps too. Two wheels gives way to three, three to four and four to multiple axled vehicles, with a fudge factor for vehicle width and velocity.  Cost of vehicle plays a part, the more expensive your car, the more
arrogantly you assume everyone must get out of your way.

So if you still insist on driving here and you have gone past ninety days, what do you do?  You go to the LTO, or Land Transportation Office.  Not every LTO issues licenses, make sure it is a larger, regional office.  The main LTO in Cebu now issues the plastic card “permanent license” the same day,
allegedly.  I waited 8 months for mine after being told it would take six at the Danao branch.  In the interim I had a paper “temporary license”.

As a foreigner you can’t have a “professional” license as this is only for those who earn a living driving, like taxi drivers and this and most all land transportation jobs are off limits to foreigners.  So you get a “non-professional” license.  Make sure you specifiy motorcycle and car if you want to ride a
motorbike. Even if your home license isn’t endorsed for a motorbike, they should give you the “restriction” on your Filipino license. (1 and 2)  Once at the LTO, push through the milling crowd and go to the window marked licenses. Ignore the “fixers”, they’ll only cause you grief. Usually your
foreigner face will get you inside asap.  Ask for the form to transfer your license, fill it out, or up, as they say here.  Then you will go for a drug test.  Nearby will be several “Diagnostic Centers” where you will pay P250-300 and pee in a cup. I was told I was drug free but four months pregnant.  Actually,
my sample wasn’t even checked!  Then you need a health check.  At Mandaue there are several doctors offices nearby where you go and have your blood pressure checked, answer some questions, do an eye test and that’s it.  

At Danao I had to tramp around the municipal offices paying for a stamp, then getting a receipt, then being checked etc. Mandaue was much simpler. Once you have the drug test receipt and the health receipt, return to the LTO.  They will then get you to copy the answers for the test onto the back of
your form. Only copy answers 1-40, as 41-60 are for professional licenses. Copying the answers is the authorised procedure, so don’t make a big deal about it.

They don’t have the resources to properly test anyone, which is evident on the roads.  So once you copy the answers, you go and get a photo taken and they print out your temporary license.  You pay P500 and then get another photo taken for the permanent license, ready in six months. Apparently they have to be sent to Manila for some reason, although the LTO offices in Cebu and Davao (not Danao) can issue the same day.  Given Mandaue LTO is about five miles from the Cebu LTO, I wonder why they can’t…..nevermind, this is the Philippines.

So off you go and when you return in six months, hopefully your permanent licenese will be ready to be picked up.  It is valid for two to three years, depending when you had your last birthday, which will be the day used to calculate renewal. All up it should cost around P1000 or so, although the official fees on the LTO website don’t quite match what everyone pays.

Check out the government websites listed in another article this issue for more details and drive safely.  (The author was a Military Police Advanced Driving Instructor, specialising in Defensive and
Protection Driving, as well as having raced, rallied, instructed in off road driving for Land Rover Australia and driven well over a million kilometres accident free. As a Military Policeman he attended numerous fatal and non-fatal traffic accidents. He has also received advanced driving instruction from several civilian schools, driven in Europe, Asia the USA and New Zealand in addition to Australia.  He holds licenses for cars, trucks, forklifts, buses, motorbikes and armoured fighting vehicles, one of which he often wished he owned here in  Cebu.) 

With over 20 years hands-on experience in the Philippines, Perry Gamsby is considered an authority on the facts of expatriate life in this fascinating archipelago.  As well as having a Filipina wife, four children and the requisite extended Filipino family, Perry is a teacher of Filipino Martial Arts and a former travel editor of the country’s leading map and travel atlas publisher. Five years ago he created Streetwise Philippines Inc. publishing eBook guides to the Philippines for expat readers.

His first book and to date, still the best seller, is “Philippine Dreams” (also sold in some markets as “StreetWise Philippines”). This comprehensive examination of the phenomenon of Filipinas, the Philippines and his own decision to move to the Philippines and pursue his dream of living in a tropical paradise strikes a chord with all who read it.  Written in an entertaining yet informative style, the eBook explores life and living in the Philippines in a special way: “This is what happens, this is why it happens, this is what you as an expat can do to understand what happens.” You can read more about Philippines Dreams at http://www.philippine-dreams.com/ 

“Philippine Dreams” created a demand for more information, especially about the four most important topics of the matrix:  meeting a Filipina, marrying and migrating a Filipina, putting a roof over your head if you decided to live in the Philippines and finding ways to pay for all of this!  The results were “Filipina 101-How To Meet The Filipina of Your Dreams” (co-written with his Filipina wife, Amelita) and “Filipina 202 – How To Marry And Migrate Your Dream Filipina”. These valuable guides dismiss the misinformation and stereotyping of the Filipina on the many online dating/matchmaking sites and provide a balanced and informative guide to men looking for Filipina wives.   You can read more about these guides at  http://www.filipina101.com and http://www.filipina202.com  

Perry has completed ‘Filipina 303 – Making The Magic Last’ although at this stage it has not been decided if the eBook will be released separately or as part of a three volume compilation of the ‘Filipina’ series.

Perry then released “The Philippines Property Primer – The StreetWise Guide to Buying, Renting or Leasing Property”.  This is a ‘first read’ real estate guide for anyone contemplating buying, renting or leasing property in the Philippines.  Over the years, as well as buying, leasing and renting several properties himself in the Philippines, Perry has observed many people lose large amounts of money in property here; most of the time because they are not dealing with legitimate sellers or they have not protected their investment by taking the simple precautions listed in the eBook.  The Philippines Property Primer has all of the basic information you need to assist you in making a more informed decision.  You can read more about The Philippines Property Primer at http://www.philippinespropertyprimer.com/   

THE LATEST RELEASE FROM STREETWISE PHILIPPINES

Although the topic of how to make a living in the Philippines was covered in brief in “Philippine Dreams”, the response from readers was so insistent that a new, updated and more in depth guide on how to support yourself and your family in the Philippines has been released.  “MAKING A LIVING IN THE PHILIPPINES – The StreetWise Guide To Business, Employment and Investing”, will tell you what you need to know to operate a small business, get a job or invest in a tightly regulated, highly competitive and immensely volatile marketplace.  It has been written with the average guy in mind; the everyday guy without the big retirement income set-up or pre-arranged ‘fatcat’ expat job contract who wants to escape to the Philippines and live every day with the Filipina of his dreams but still needs to make a living! 

You can read more about “Making A Living In The Philippines” at http://www.makingalivinginthephilippines.com/  or check out all the Streetwise Philippines publications at http://www.streetwisephilippines.com/  The eBook, contains a wealth of information otherwise impossible to glean without having been there, done that.  In the safety of your own home you can learn first hand what is required to survive in a third world economy and be better equipped to decide if you should risk selling up and making that life changing move!

This E-Book will explain to you everything you need to know to start up a small business, get a job or invest in the Philippines!

The very latest publication is ‘Philippines Survival Handbook’ which takes a very holistic and comprehensive view of the things that can give you grief in the Philippines. From bent coppers to under-age girl scams, snakes and sea creatures to dangerous bus rides!